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July 9, 2009

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Food, and My Aversion to It.

I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining, but I’m not going to lie–life has gotten harder in week 7. There are 2 little babies growing inside me and they are really starting to kick my ass.


Food has been the biggest challenge. I still don’t have that much true ‘nausea’ or at least I don’t think I do. Maybe I’m kidding myself and waiting for something really, really bad and this is bad. But there hasn’t been any vomiting or gagging and for that I am very grateful.
Instead, I just get incredibly queasy and dizzy when I haven’t eaten and yet I am hungry for NOTHING.

At this point, I just try to make myself eat, but everything tastes like sawdust. Yesterday I had a rare moment where pizza sounded like a good idea, so during one of my ‘feeling pretty good’ moments I managed to make a really great healthy pizza: grilled chicken, spinach, mushrooms-it even looked good to me. Then I ate it and it was like I was chewing cardboard.

Today I was reading all about how early weight gain in the first trimester is critical for multiples and I just felt like crying. I was not eating the ‘average’ amount of calories before I got pregnant and now…I am not getting the extra calories either. It’s so many calories for someone my size. I can’t even imagine how I could eat that many calories feeling like I do. It’s starting to stress me out and I think I might just have to go get some of those Ensure or Boost drinks just to make sure I get enough calories.

I’m sorry if this sounds so whiny. I am just feeling pretty crappy. Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy to finally be pregnant and I know we are so blessed, but this constant ick feeling is draining.
This is a roller coaster right now. I feel bad, I feel OK, back and forth, up and down. I never know how long the feeling will last and it’s exhausting because I don’t ever feel like myself anymore.

Sorry for being the bitchy pregnant lady. I’m just telling it like it is. The good and the bad.