The nervous part is that she’s a right-wing, Christian conservative, born-again Southern Baptist and we have very little in common. I mean….so little.
We can’t talk about politics or religion, obviously. We can’t talk about current/world events because my mom doesn’t follow anything larger than her local newspaper (and that is a very small town newspaper). We don’t like the same movies. She loves to shop and I can’t stand to shop so that’s out. I don’t like her cooking, so I would prefer she not make dinner. And the list goes on.
But her trips to NYC have always been quite successful (versus my trips to her house which have been so spectacularly unsuccessful that I once left the house on Christmas Eve with every intention of hitch hiking back home–2,000 miles away. I no longer will visit on any major holiday–religious or not).
In NYC we can always stay BUSY. We both love walking about this city and just seeing new things–so we DO have that in common. There is always something to do, somewhere to go. You can go, go, go and….never really have to spend that much “time” with each other where something else isn’t the focus. This has worked really well. And in the times we aren’t ‘going’ I have found myself in that uncomfortable silence. You know the kind.
I’ve never had my mom come visit where we didn’t have a gazillion ‘things’ planned to do. But I’m not doing much these days! I need more sleep and I can’t ever be far from a toilet (because if you try to drink a gallon of water a day, you’ll find out a nearby toilet is a very necessary thing). I can’t walk all over the city nor do I have any desire to go to a museum and stand for hours. I don’t even want to cram myself in one of those little seats for a Broadway show. I *might* want to go to a movie, but it probably won’t be one she wants to see. I do a lot of sitting around with my feet up, reading books and drinking water.
What the hell do I do with my mother??
She won’t go out alone, even to the grocery store around the corner and I honestly can’t entertain her like I normally do. I would really love it if she said “you know I’d like to spend the afternoon at the (fill in the blank) museum” and I could give her the directions to get there and everyone would be happy. But that’s not going to happen.
She does love our cats and is perfectly content chilling with the cats, so at least that’s a huge bonus.
Most of the time when she visits, I try hard to accommodate her idea of acceptable menu items. This means no Asian or Indian. Did I mention those are the two major food groups we live on in this house? But this time, I’m sorry, I’m pregnant and I need to eat what I’m hungry for.
She’s either going to have to deal with “Asian” the same way I deal with her cooking when I go to her house, or order her own dinner! This is the one thing I’m holding firm on.
She was telling me about the size of her suitcase and it occurred to me that I knew when she was arriving, but I didn’t know when she was leaving. “Wednesday. Unless you want me to leave sooner.”
“Let’s talk about that on Monday, shall we?”
I love her. I really do. But this could be a very long week. Wish me luck.
At least we have baby stuff to talk about. Let’s hope I’m worried for nothing.