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November 19, 2010

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How Quickly I Forgot

Whoop Whoop is crazy from the standing and I am crazy from the crying. Grunter went through the same thing a month or so ago, but I don’t remember it being quite this bad.

The morning nap isn’t SO bad, but the afternoon nap is wretched. He stands up in the crib and then he just can’t get back down. I keep practicing with him, but he hasn’t gotten it yet.
I want to go back in and help him, but the day I did that too soon, Grunter wasn’t asleep yet. Well, once Grunter saw me they both started wailing and I’m now trying to comfort both of them. It was complete chaos and tears. That day neither of them napped. I’ve never had a day like that.

Today, I waited until I couldn’t hear Grunter anymore and went in to help W2 down. By the time I got to the door, he was standing back up again. Back I go, show him how to get back down, rub his back, try to calm him down and….same thing.
This is normally the time I use to pump and eat lunch. That didn’t happen today. I stood at the door, peeking through the crack and every time W2 would get up, I’d go back in and repeat.
After 15 times and over 45 minutes with his cries now a “10”, I knew he wasn’t going to “get it”. Not today. Not this nap. I nursed him to sleep and put him back to bed sleeping.
He had to get some sleep and this was the only way, but I need him to figure out how to get down, not how to get me to nurse him to sleep!

Luckily, Grunter, who is inches away from his brother’s head, slept through the entire thing. Which is why I tell mother’s of twins….keep your kids sleeping in the same room–they WILL learn to sleep through each other crying! It’s amazing!

I just don’t know what to do or how long this is going to take. Any advice from those who are dealing/have dealt with this??
I don’t remember it being this bad or taking this long with Grunter, but maybe it did and I’m blocking it out because it was that bad. All I know is that Chicken, who was on a conference call (in the hallway as there was nowhere to go in the apartment!), heard how bad it was and offered to take them out for an hour after they woke up. She is such an amazing mamma and partner to me.

I just sat on the bed and cried after she left. These are the days that I feel like such a failure as a mother. I get very overwhelmed on afternoons such as these and just wonder what the hell I’m doing. Being a stay at home mom is the best thing on earth, but my god, I had NO idea how hard raising twins was going to be–especially going through the sucky stuff like this, TWICE.
I’m so thankful for all the good days we’ve been having and just keep taking deep breaths and reminding myself that tomorrow is a new day.