My antral follicle count in October was SIX. That means according to this chart I have a ZERO chance of having a live birth (and yes I’m basing this on being 40 because let’s face it I almost am) even if I were to do another IVF cycle. Yes, I know the count can change from month to month…but really. My chances? Not so good.
I’ve gone back and forth a bit this week, but I’m getting a lot better at accepting that I’ve done all I can to try to make this baby and now it’s time to “let go and let God”.
This chart certainly helped me get there:
Wow. Zero. Holy Shit. My eggs are MthrFng old.
The hardest thing for me has been the fact I never got to actually ‘finish’ an IVF cycle. I never even made it that far but now that I see this chart….I guess everything happens for a reason.
I’m glad that I got pregnant, just that one time, for just a little while. It’s my damn badge of honor at this point.
I will never know what it’s like to look at my baby and think “those are my eyes” or “that little quirk is all me” but I will be birthing my love’s child and that child will be mine.
I am officially done whining.
Off to Egg Donor IVF land we go!
P.S.–That post involving EWCM? That was me encouraging K to go make me a baby, not the other way around!